Olga Merino Obituary

Mamita,

Time continues to go by but you are never forgotten. In fact you still fill our lives with wonderful memories and ideals that you taught us and we carry on and share with our families. That special feeling will be with me forever.

My dearest Mom,

We are all so very sad that Daddy had to leave us...we are missing him so very much, just as we continue to miss you.
I hope and pray that you are both together, with all your loved ones surrounding you and that Daddy is happy & healthy once again.

As you know, these last few years have been terrible for him, we did the best that we could to show him all our love, to take care of him to the best of our abilities and to comfort Daddy as he got worse with his illness.

I still struggle with you not being here, it's been 6 years now and I miss you so much that it still hurts.
I'm grieving Daddy too but for him, I think that right now, I am more accepting of his passing because he suffered so much for too long...and to have him finally at peace and then knowing that he and you would be reunited, well, that is what helps me right now.

Fernando is doing ok, he is grieving as we expect but what comforts me with him is that he is showing it and letting out his emotions and that is a big step forward for him.
Because as you well know, your loving son has a difficult time showing his emotions in hard times.

Your baby, Ximenita, well, this really affected her, you know how close she was to daddy. She was really struggling there for a while but slowly now, Xime is coming to terms with losing Dad and not having either of you here.

I hope that with time, we are all able to stop grieving and start remembering only the good times, the laughter, the love, the comfort that was your and Daddy's hugs, your kisses, the perfect advise, always both of your support, the goofy and silly times...and not have it hurt so much.

Well, that is it for now my precious Mom. Please give Daddy a hug from me and all my love. Tell him that he was the most wonderful, amazing, loving & supportive Dad that anyone could have asked for. I miss him. I miss you.

I love you,

Maria

Dear Mom (mi Cuquita),
It's been 5 years since your passing. I miss you so very much. This past year especially has been a bit rough for us all.
Daddy is declining yet more and more, it breaks our hearts to see him so frail and sometimes disoriented but we thank God that he's not in any pain. That's important.
The CNA'S that we currently have here taking care of him are all so wonderful with him. We are truly so appreciative of each one, Maria, Jill & Glenda. Great girls, who all really take time and make an effort to keep Daddy as comfortable and happy at humanly possible. He, in turn, likes them and is very confortable with them. Small blessings, right Mom?

Well, you will be thrilled to know (not that you don't already, hahaha) that Coquito is going to a Tech school in about a month, to learn about the HVAC business so that he can work for Doug. It's all very exciting for us as parents, knowing that he's going to have a career to fall back on and possibly inherit the business if things work out as we all hope. Douglas is very interested and seems eager to study this field and start making more money and focus on his future.
He & Cyn are still together and are planning on a future together, I hope that it works out for them, but her religion is becoming quite an issue and while we all respect it, we don't agree with a lot of her beliefs and now Douglas will be in a position that he'll have to either become a part of it and you know where he stands on religion right now so I just hope that he is true to himself and that they can both come to some sort of compromise as to what will work for each of them and also for them as a couple. We shall see.

Danielita is doing really great at school, as you know, her final major is now becoming a Physical Therapist. She is finishing up all her prerequisite classes now and is going to start the Univerity applications next month. She's very excited and nervous at the same time.

Doug, Douglas and Danielita have been my saving grace throughout this past year not only with Dad but because of my illness....the docs agree that it's all to due with the stress that we have all been dealing with since you passed on, I guess that since I'm not one to let out my feelings, my immune system when haywire, hahaha so I've gotten sick, with low grade temps, felt exhausted all the time and generally a bit depressed. This has taken a big toll on me and I am now trying to fight it and trying to get better with meditation, acupuncture and an anxiety/depression med that hopefully will help. It bothers me more because I have always been "in charge", lol, so to speak, so it's very hard for me to have been sidelined for practically a year and not have been able to be more physically hands on with my family, home and most importantly with Daddy...so your second son, lol and your grand kids here have been unbelievably eonferul with their help in all aspects. I couldn't be more grateful and proud and love them any more than I do. My little angels.

Memitos is doing really well, she and Peteare do good together, he has been helping her through all that's been going on with Dad and he's a good listener and loves her and takes good care of her and vice a versa. Memitos is handling all this with Dad with strength and support from Pete, us and your son.

Well, Mom, my med is making me sleepy, I've got another cold, that's how it's been this past year, always getting something on top of this immune problem....so, I will say bye for now and I will come back soon to continue with more of our family.

I love you very much and I miss you each and every day. Keep watch over us please.

Your daughter,

Maria E ??

Hola abuelita, Chiquita, Bonita!
It's been so long since I last wrote in here I know you aren't in the physical form to actually go on here and read this but I know as I'm thinking of what to write you can hear me! I'm finally a college graduate I know you waited for this day for so long you were the only person that would have made my experience that much more! I hope I've made you proud grandma because that was my aim in life you were the only main one that kept me going with school it was a long four years without you but I did it you never know how strong you are until you have to be! After graduating I went to chicago to visit so sad I didn't get to go visit you but I was with grandpa a lot I love that man so much I can't bear to lose him like I lost you grandma please give him the strength he needs Chicago isn't the same without you things are so different now and especially since grandpa isn't in the best of health I pray god watches over him for me! I miss you more than words can even say Im at a crossroads right now with life grandma and I hope you can give me guidance like you use to wish you were here still breaks my heart to think about! Well grandma I'll cut this long message now there is much more to say but I'll talk to you tonight in my prayers! I love and miss you immensely I'm glad youre in peace now but we all wish you could be here with us please watch over my dad too he doesn't really talk about it but I know his pain about you is much deeper than we can see! Until we meet in heaven, I'll see you when it's my time! Love you abuelita!

Hi Mom,
Another year has gone by....I can't believe it. I miss you now as much as when you had to leave us, isn't that something? I know that they say that time helps to heal but I guess it's going to take a little more time.

As you know, Daddy is struggling still with all that's been happening to him, this Parkinsons is a bad illness and I can only pray that God will guide us and help him to get through this with as much dignity and as pain free as it can be. We are hoping that the surgery on his bladder, that is tentatively scheduled for Jan, will be confirmed soon and that it works!! One less thing for him to worry about and deal with.
He's adjusting to the 'girls' here with him 24/7 but continues to complain about them, critizes little things, he's a little devil and tells me that they can go home now...too funny.
Mom, you were so right about Daddy, you knew him 100% through and through and knew exactly how he'd be, I really wish you were here to help us out with him in the sense that you always knew what to say, what to do to make him feel better, we continue to struggle at times on that front, ha-ha-ha...

All your grandkids are doing well, for the most part... Rosa is a great mother, working hard. She has Chris by her side who is a great guy & father.
Your great-grand-babies are growing up way too fast.
Emi is the most kind-hearted little girl, a good soul - as you would say. Her smile just melts me.
Christa is a hoot, she is soooo much like you, we all just crack up with her, strong personality, both girls are very precious and smart and beautiful.
Caro is making you proud every day, she's almost done with school and we too are very proud of her. She's really coming into her own and will do great in the real world. She won't settle for less than wonderful.
We pray that God is watching over Mer.
Douglas is finally out of the Hacienda and enjoying (for the most part, hahaha) a new job as security for a Club downtown, he works with some friends, which makes me feel better.
He comes home with many hysterically funny stories as only he can tell them and has me laughing all the time. I really hope that he gets some good opportunities through this new position and that he can take advantage of them.
Bolita is studying to be a Physical Therapist, somehow I know that you would approve of this career, you knew her so well, she loves to help people and she's so caring & this will showcase her attributes. She's excited about it and we all know that she'll do great in that field and have a great future.
As you know, she's left Josh, and while it was a very difficult time for her, especially those first few months, she's coming along beautifully and is so strong and smart about it, we know that she'll come through it just fine.
Your Memitos is also doing very well, things at work are good, she's happy to have her job still, lol. Pete is great with her and they compliment each other beautifully, they make a great pair.

Lynny is doing okay, some health issues that we pray will be taken care of very soon. She worries for us while going through this with Daddy and she's been a big help with her support and all her love. She misses you too.

Doug is good, a few aches and pains here and there but he loves his sports and won't stop them just yet, so he'll suffer through that for a while yet, lol. Work is going well, he's content and comfortable with where things are right now, not to say that it couldn't be better but with this economy it could be so much worse, so he's good and we're all very grateful and appreciative for what we have.

Well, my darling little Mamu, what can I say? I love you and miss you so much, words can't really express those feelings but you know how I'm feeling.
I sometimes feel so lost without you. When I get so down, I then rely on my wonderful family, each and every one of them.
Doug, as you know is amazing, he is my rock, he's so wonderful but you know that, right? The kids help out a lot and that gives me great pride. I'm so blessed.

I hope that the new year brings us a bit of comfort and good health and I hope that Dad can maintain his health for as long as possible.
I love you. I'll try to post more updates soon.
All my love, your daughter,
Maria E :-)

With all my love, this candle is for for you Mom, it'll guide us through this season and remind us to share in the happy times not just the sad. Love, Maria

Hi Abuelita. How are you? I'm doing okay, but I could be doing better if you were here with us. I miss you so much. It still hurts so much to know that we've lost you. I'm still living life to the fullest but I'm still depressed. I don't talk about it much, I know I should though. I remember telling you about my problem I had with my birth control pills and how they made me depressed and angry, but I am doing much better. I'm on a new pill and I feel fine. My life is pretty great right now! Josh and I are doing very good. We will be together for two years on the 29th of November. He actually got a tattoo of my name on him. Don't worry it is a very nice tattoo. Also don't worry, I'm not getting another tattoo.....yet, lol. Josh and I will obviously be getting married, in the next 5 years or so. It's crazy to think that I'm almost at that point in my life. It's also crazy to think that I'm going to be 21 in 2 months. Crazy how time flys by! I see that mom has informed you about my decision on going to NIU, well hopefully I'll be going there. Ugh it's hard to write to you because I should be able to talk to you face to face. I wish you could be here so you could e met Josh. You would love him. He is he best thing in my life right now. I might take him to see you at the cemetery. But only if he wants to go. I need to come visit you. I miss you so much. I can't imagine what Ito is goon through though. Please ask God to watch over him. Well I love you very much and miss you terribly. I'll cone visit you soon. Te quiero mucho Abuelita. Love, Dra. Boo :)

HI Mom, I was so tired yesterday when writing to you that I made a mistake in the University that our Bolita is hoping to attend, it's NIU...Northern Illinois University, in DeKalb, IL, she'll be rooming there for the duration of her studies...Lord, can't believe I put the wrong one down, fraudian slip, huh? Lol. Love you. Maria

Dear Mom, well, another year is approaching without you here. I miss you very much...my heart is still so sad without you here. This time of year is hard for me as I'm certain for the whole family too. Dad is hanging on, as you can see. It's been a struggle for him and all of us who want to see him in a better place in his life. We do our best to make him comfortable, let him know that we love him and want the best for him and that we care and want to be here for him for anything he'd need. He misses you so much. You know how he is and you knew exactly how he'd be without you here, we're trying our best and I think that you know that. Today we had wonderful day, we also celebrated Lynny's birthday, you would have made a lovely dessert for her and bought her a great gift.
We didn't get to share it with Dad, as you can imagine, he had a very difficult time with today and was not able to come down to join us but we all went upstairs, one by one to say hello, give him a hug and visit with him, he liked that very much. This Thanksgiving was so different for us but we managed to have a good time, enjoy some laughs and appreciate what we do have in our little family.
As you probably saw, your son-in-law, 'Ojala', as always, did an amazing job with not one but two turkeys this year! He's so wonderful, I love him more each day but you knew that and I know that you loved him for that and so much more. To be honest, my preference is the fried turkey and we missed not being able to share the crispy crunchy delectable skin with you, I know how much you loved that little ritual. We were able to visit with Pete, he came for a short visit and he brought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers, gorgeous colors and a tasty apple pie. Josh also came over, he's so sweet, your granddaughter is so in love with him, wish you were here to share that with us. He's a really good guy and loves her very much, I think they will be happy together and have a good future.
Boo is so ready to face the world and hoping to get accepted to UIC, your "ojala" had a difficult time with this for many reasons but relented to letting her go we pray now that she gets accepted, she was thrilled by his decision. It's going to be so hard to let her go...but you know your Bolita, she's a strong individual and knows what she wants, I think she'll do very well on her own for and learn so much about life and all it offers.
Your Coquito is going through a sad time, broke up with Cyn, she is a lovely girl but too many obstacles for them to make a positive future together so they have separated, Douglas is sad but it was mutual and he's going to focus on setting some goals and working towards them for his own personal growth and financial future.
Well, I'll write to you again very soon, my love is with you always. (Wonder if you cooked everyone an amazing meal today...)
:-), bye for now Mom, with all my love, your daughter, Maria

Hi, Mom, Happy New Year! I just read what Fernando wrote and it was a beautiful hommage to you...he said it so perfectly, you were always there for us, I never knew a moment of fear/uncertainty when you were with us, never felt like we ever did 'without'. When you were with us we just knew everything would be fine. Fernando knew you very well, he's the observer in our family, he's an amazing brother and you'll be happy to see that he carries with him all the wonderful traits that you've instilled in all of us. Doug loves him as much as any brother could, my kids appreciate him and love him very much, he'a a good uncle. Though he's younger than me, I look up to him and value his opinions, suggestions and thoughts. We all were able to ring in the New Year without a dark cloud over us, I am very thankful for that and while the family all did something on their own, we rang in the New Year without problems or tears. Doug and & I were alone for the first New Year's Eve in many years yet it was perfect...we closed out the old on a good note and rang in the new with a happy and content feeling and with the fact that that's how is should be. The kids each did their own thing, as it also should be...enjoying their youth and being with the people that will be a big part of their lives for many years to come. I didn't make any new year's resolutions; I've come to the conclusion that if anything is that important then I should be doing it all year long or thinking of it all year long, not just at New Year's. I hope you see how good your grandkids & great-grankids are doing, from Rosa, who I know you are very proud of for going back to school and being such a good mother to her little ones, to your tiniest of great-grandchild, Christalynn or C, as I like to call her. You would just love her! ...Her cheeks alone could keep you busy for a very long time, ha-ha-ha! Our Emi is getting so big and she's so smart and beautiful, I miss her and the rest of them all so much, though the miles separate us, we manage to keep each-other posted on what's happening in our lives and so we have that little thread that will always keep us connected no matter how far away we all are. Caro is doing wonderfully at the universaty, she's struggling a bit with her love-life but she's a strong & smart young lady and will succeed in anything she does and choose wisely, our little Mer is going through a very tough teenage-time right now but I know you will help her and guide her, we all have much faith in her and that she'll do what's right for herself and be true to herself. Douglas is still trying to find his way career-wise but for now he's happy with his personal life and enjoying life in general. Finally, your Dra. Boo. she too is doing very well, doing great in school and is so happy with her Josh (I think you would really like him, Dad does) and quite content with her life in general. Doug and I talk about you all the time, he sees how sad I get and he's just wonderful with me, getting me out of my funk and all, I know how much you love him and he's even more amazing, I love him very much...withou his love and support I would be in a bad place right now. Like you always said, he has a big heart. He too misses you very much and there are times we both cry thinking & talking of you. You are very loved by so many people, I hope that somehow you knew that & knew that you were a very special lady, not just to us your kids & family, but to many others who also miss you. Daddy is sort of 'lost' still, I hope that time continues to give him the chance to make his life without you, more fullfilling... you know him so well, I am grateful that he is with us, he's so comfy in the little apartment, it suits him so well, I hope he sees that we need him still and that he's loved by us all. Day by day, huh? Well, I'm off to clean a bit, still dealing with the problem in my left arm but confident that it will be cured soon and that I can go back to a more normal life. I know that you were watching over me on that fateful day and I feel blessed to have had you there and to have you in my life still if only in my heart and mind. I love you, Mom. I'll pop in soon again to keep you updated...(as if you didn't know all this already...ha-ha-ha). Love your daughter, Mo or "Xi-Maria", as you used to say. ;-)

Dear Mother,

You were a very private woman and I am very fortunate to have had a Beautiful, kind, dear and caring Mother. I am amazed of how much you endured during you last days with us.
Always trying to keep a smile until the very end.
Always caring for others first.
Since you had little time; about a year. That was enough to make sure that Dad would be well of, by himself. Doing the daily routine things that you normally took care of. Together with Dad you raised us with values, respect for others, honesty, self respect, giving, and most of all love or our family.
You were small in stature, but you had a big heart. When out Father flew to the United States, he had time to get things ready for us; he had a job, a furnished apartment and toys for us, you stepped right in and made it our home. Years later to make ends meet you helped by working. I remember we almost lost you when it was very windy and you were walking to work and had to hang on to a train bridge tussle so you wouldn’t be blown away, and you made it to work.
You never neglected us, I remember way back when I was very little you gave me a bath in cold water. I remember that I was crying and didn’t know at the time that I had a very high fever and that if you did do that I could have been very ill. Another time we were coming back from shopping and there was a down pour and you found us shelter at the closest house awning. One time we got home and were locked out of our apartment and we had to wait until Dad got home, but we didn't go without eating. Since there weren’t any restaurants by our neighborhood you went to the grocery and bought bread and cold cuts and we had dinner.
You kept our traditions and our traditional food. You cooked almost every day for us and never complained. When there were guests, they always complimented your cooking, so much that some wife’s were a bit jealous. They could never make dished like you did.
You always carried yourself like a true lady; even until the last day that I felt you took your last breath. I felt an enormous loss, but yet you were still with us at all times.
I was not able to speak at your funeral, because there were so many feelings that were running thru my mind.
You will always beloved and missed by many who knew you and didn’t.
I love you my dear Mother,
Your loving son,
Fernando

Dear Mamu,
We made it through another year/holiday without you...we did enjoy our Christmas Eve, we were very fortunate to have been able to still celebrate with many gifts especially during this economic crisis. We all received such beautiful gifts, I loved all of mine! Dad was in good spirits, we kept giving him my famous Sangria and he was very happy, ha-ha-ha. He partcipated very well and it made us all happy to see that. Of course Douglas and Daniela enjoyed it the most, since they got the most gifts but that's how it should be, Christmas is for the kids. We spent another very nice day on the 25th at Lynny's, she made us her famous Dutch Babies, (you loved those) and her delicious Huevos Rancheros, you also liked those very much, it was yummy, we ate way too much but it was all worth it. Dad ate a lot too, which is rare for him but he was very comfortable. Xime asked for 3rds, (but shhhh, don't say anything...ha-ha-ha). We all came home to relax. The rest of the day Doug and I just spent it together, watching movies or reading, it was great, peaceful and so very nice. Memitos also enjoyed the rest of the day with Daddy, they made a nice dinner and just relaxed the rest of the day too. I was so happy that Cecilia was here to help Dad get through the day. I thouhgt about you an awful lot this year, guess just missing you more. I love you very much, Mom. Saying bye for now, off to catch another movie with Doug. Sending you lots of hugs. Your daughter, Mo

Dear Mom,

Well, another year has passed and it's still very hard for me to accept that you are not with us. I miss you. We all miss you so very much. My little Boo has written to you about her feelings and how hard it's been for her to let it all out and try to find some peace in the knowledge that you are fine and can not be with us anymore. It's true that she and I have been bickering but I think it's because this day was looming in front of us and we are still trying to deal with your passing...it puts us in different mind sets and so it's sometimes easier to snap at each other than to realize why it's happening. My Boo is very intuitive, sensitive and feels things very deeply which can be good and bad for her. She has such a good soul, she cares so much and is still being affected by your being taken from us, as I am. Some may think, okay, it's been 2 years, let's move on but it's how we feel and sometimes the grief, saddness and pain takes over and we react in different ways, trying to cope with it. Boo and I have always made up after our little arguments and I know she'll be fine, it's just going to take her and I a little bit longer for us to get over this and be able to move forward as we should. We're like to peas in a pod or ("pareja de aretes"), ha-ha-ha, like you used to say. Mom, I hope you can see us and know that while some of us suffering still, we'll eventually understand this and move on. Never forgetting you and all that you were and what you meant to each and every one of us but allowinbg us to remember you with love and happiness instead of us being sad and hurting yet. Two years and I feel like it just happened...not to worry about our little Boo, we'll take good care of her and love her and help her continue to go through the process as best we can. She's going to be all right, we'll make sure of that. Daddy is also still not in that place yet, we are doing all that we can to make sure he feels loved and taken care of. He too will move on in time. I love you, Mom, I miss you. Hope you are visiting with many of your loved ones, have you seen Abuelita yet? I'm hoping that she's one of the first people you reunited with up there. Hugs and kisses, with all my love,your daughter, Mo

Hi Abuelita, how are you doing? Haha that's a funny question. Well me i'm not doing that well. I need someone to talk to, i feel alone. I have been getting very angry lately for like that past couple of months and i'm not sure as to why I am getting so mad. I think it might have to do with you. I think i am still so mad that you are gone. I think your death has really affected me in a way i didn't experience until now. I think having to see you die like that was what really topped it off because with Grandpa Greg, he died almost instantly and same with Jim, but with you, you kept fighting till the end. I'll admit it now that it really depressed me to see you like how you were and to have seen you take you last breath really shook me up. I can't really tell my parents that that is the reason why I think i am acting the way i am because they will probably tell me that that is not a good reason to get that upset over, but they are wrong. As i said before in my last entry i miss you so much. I admired you strength so much and the ability you had to make everyone around you feel so comfortable and for them to not have any care in the world. You were and still are my Angel.

I hate how i am acting. Mom and i have gotten into a couple arguments and i do not like it one bit. The last thing i want is for me and mom to be mad at each other and not talk to each other. It really hurts me. I am acting like a little twit and it's not good at all. I hate getting angry and i think i seriously need help to get all this anger out of me. Like i mean professional help. My parents will probably think i am crazy but i can't help this anger problem i have. I am going to do some research as to what different disorders there are when you are dealing with the loss of a loved one. I may be depressed and it may just all be hitting me now but i'm not sure and it is scaring me because i am so afraid i will do something stupid.

Well thank you for letting me talk to you Ita, even if you can't tell me how to solve this you helped me a whole bunch and my chest doesn't feel so heavy now. I love you and miss you so darn much. I will write to you on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day! Te quiero mucho!

Hello Abuelita, how are you? I needed to write to you so I can let my emotions out. As I'm writing this I am crying because I miss you so much it hurts so much. I always say it wasn't fair that God took you away so fast, and I mean it. I wish you never got sick at all. I wish you were still here with us. We need you here! It hurts so much without you here. Yes we may look like we are living our lives but we will never be alive as much as we were when you were here. The memories from the night of your passing feel like they are on repeat. I can't get them out of my head. To see you like that was probably one of the hardest things I had to experience in my life, besides losing you and realizing you weren't coming back. There are days where my heart actually aches and sometimes I can't bare the pain. I really don't let everyone know that because I want to be strong, but I guess everyone will know now. Ha-ha. There are and were so many things I wanted you to be apart of Ita. Like for instance my graduation and the day I met the love of my life. I always thank you Abuelita for Josh. I know that you sent him for me. You saw his qualities are just like my Dad's and you gave me the best gift of all. One thing that has been bothering me is that the fact that you won't be here for my wedding, which is in about 5 or 6 years! Ha-ha. It's just really hard to not have you here. We all miss you very much, especially now since the holidays are right around the corner. I'm pretty sure you heard already but for our Christmas dinner we are having it in honor of you. We are making some Ecuadorian dishes as well as some dishes that you liked from Grandma Lynn and Tia Cecilia. I think it will definately be a nice dinner.

Well as you can see it is pretty late here, but I just needed to write to you and kinda vent and let some of the feelings I've been feeling get off of my chest. I love you so much and miss you so much. Please continue to watch after all of us. I love you!

Love, Dra. Boo :)

Hi, Mamu, how are you? Silly question huh? Guess you are about as perfect as one can get. I miss you so. I wanted to share that we were able to visit Paty and her family in Seattle, we took Dad, your other kids cames as well and we had the Best time ever. It was so beautiful up there, Paty is so kind and loving as is her wonderful family, Jorge, Dani & Andres, who I had called Alejandro when I'd met him,he was too cute, he calmly just said, "it's Andres", he's so sweet and very tall like your Coquito. Daniela is like our Daniela, very sweet but also a go-getter. We all blended so well, like we'd never spent so much time apart, Paty had a lot of current pictures of the rest of the family, it was great to see them as they are now. It was also the most special time for me, to get to enjoy Daddy, my sis and brother all at one time too. We laughed our way through the whole trip, we had so much fun, which are now treasured memories. I leave with Lynny for our trip to Florida this Saturday. Can't wait! The sun, the surf, the drinks...ha-ha-ha. As you know, she's had a very rough year with all the surgeries and rehab and so much pain, still to this date with her shoulder, so this trip will be good for her in many ways. We'll have a great time, we always laugh and are so comfortable together. Your 'other' son, ha-ha, is also going away for a boat race during the time I'll be gone, please watch over him. And the kids and Dad, they're fine staying home but Daddy may feel my absence, Memitos is coming in for the weekend, which makes me feel better and he's very happy about seeing her. Guess what? I just mailed out Christalynn's 1-year birthday gift!! Can you believe it? She's just beuutiful and so smart, just like little Emi is. Rosa is doing such a great job with both girls and as you also know, she just turned 25 on your same day. And your wish came true with her, that she's back in school! We are all very proud of her. We also met Chris, (her better half), he's a really nice guy, he is really in tune with both of the little ones and they love him a lot. Well, I'll write more later, I'm off to finish some laundry and run a few errands. I love and miss you very, very much. Your daughter, Maria E.

Hola Abuelita, como estas? Practicando mi Español. :) I just wanted to write to you and say hello and to tell you that i love you and miss you! As you know the holiday season is coming up and everyone is getting a little on edge because we know what to expect. It's always hard to think of a holiday we always celebrated together and to think that you won't be sharing it with us anymore hurts so much. The weather right now is reminding me of Christmas time. It's so cold out. Maybe you can have a talk with Mother Nature and tell her to let us have a normal mild fall. Thanksgiving is coming up and of course we are having the traditional meal, but for Christmas this year we are going to make a lot of different dishes. We are going to cook some of your dishes that we love so much and also Grandma Lynn is making her Chicken Tetrazzini. Yummy! I love Christmas. It's just the perfect holiday to come together with your family. It's also one of the hardest holidays for us. I almost don't want it to come because i know you still won't be here with us. To not be able to see your little face and hear your voice really hurts. I came across one of our home videos and it was Christmas of 1994. When i put it in, the first person i saw was you. It brought tears to my eyes. Good tears of course, but it was a numb moment for me. It was nice to see you again, but it was hard to see you too. I would have given anything to bring that video back to life. Everyone was here. Tio and the whole family was here. It was so nice to see Rosa and Carolina when they were younger. They were and still are so cute. I loved seeing me and Carolina playing together like that. We should be sisters instead of cousins because we are so much alike. I love my family so much and I am so thankful for everything God has given me. Sure of course i wish he didn't have to take you but in time we will learn to live with that. I miss the old days but i am excited to see what the future has in hold for all of us.

Well it was nice being able to talk to you and let you know how i am feeling. This Guest Book is a great idea. It really helps all of us to vent and let our emotions run free. I miss you and love you so much Abuelita. Hope your taking care of everyone up there.

Love, Danielita

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! As you know it's rosa's birthday too! She is lucky to be able to share her birthday with the most amazing women i have ever known! Many days go by and it gets better but just the thought of you not here anymore kills me each time i think about it. I miss and love you so much! I wish you were still here!I always thought to myslef that you and grandpa would never leave! But that is just wishful thinking. I just dont understand sometimes why god had to takes you away from us!! I cant stand it but death is a part of life and it happens and im happy that at least your at rest after all the hard work you did for everyone throughout your life. Things are hard for me right now and im pretty sure you know why, but i sit there and think if you had the strength to keep on going then i can too, because your blood runs threw me and i can feel you sometimes. Some days i just want to cry and cry because its still hard to believe that you i am never going to get to see your face again or feel your lovely hugs and it hurts. But you built one great fam(ily) and with each other we can get threw it. I hate how you had to leave us on my birthday! I never mentioned this to anyone from the family but it was really hard for me to cope with the fact that you left on my birthday! Man it was just too much to deal with, because i always hear your brithday wishes and see you mostly on my birthday but i didnt get to be with you one last time on my birthday and that is unbearable, it just brings me to tears! I just wish i could have seen you one last time but i felt like it was my fault that i didnt i sometimes i regret not leaving that day my da and sisters did but i try not to because it not something good to live with because it will only deteriorate my soul. Well abuelita i love you and think of you always and often hear your voice how i once use to when i would talk to you. I love you with all my heartt! I wish you were still here. I hope your doing good in heaven with God,haha.

-Love always
your grandaughter,carolina (la bandida) :)

Happy Birthday Abuelita! I wish you were still here so I can give you your birthday hugs and kisses. We would probably be at your house or ours enjoying a nice dinner together. The holidays like birthdays, Thanksgiving and Christmas are tough without you. I wish God can just send you back to us. You hear that God! Hehe-hehe :) Feliz Cumpleaños Abuelita. I hope you enjoyed your day. I bet you cooked a delicious meal for yourself and everyone else up there. I'm sending you my birthday hugs and kisses. XOXOXOXOXOXO! I miss you and love you soooooooooooo much Abuelita! Besitos!

Love, Dra. Boo :)

Hi my little Chombotines, Happy Birthday! I've had you on my mind more so this week and how I wish you were here. We are all doing well, living life. As you can see, Dad is doing his best, some good days some bad. His health is bothering him again and he really doesn't want to continue with the doctor's visits, he has one visit more plus some lab work that's needed, he said then that that's It! He's too adorable. We all take care of him the best we can and hope that it's enough. Mom, I miss you every moment. I try to stay positive, your son-in-law helps me with that, he's pretty amazing and so loving so I still laugh and enjoy life. With out his love & support, I'd be needing a doctor myself...well, just wanted to vent a bit. I love you very much and I'll talk with you soon. Your daughter, Mo

To My Dear Mom,

I've often dreamt of your lovely face looking upon all of us here and guiding us with your special foresight and wisdom;

Sadly, that wonderful sense of "home," full of love and special comforts and mouthwatering smells of sauteed garlic and scallions and freshly chopped cilantro is no more...

Sometimes... anxious are those moments when I feel your absence all too vividly and real;

As a grown woman, I thank God that he blessed you when choosing Dad as a husband and a father; he was cut from the same cloth, shared in the same values and morals as you, was a great provider and the most loving and supportive Father while growing up;

Mom, heartwarming are those special moments when I recall your sense of humor and also how much Daddy would make you laugh throughout the years :)

Your strenght is what I draw upon when I realize how you dealt with the many trials and challenges that you faced as a woman;

Yet, above all, I feel your love and grace softly wrapped around me, as a beautiful shawl, that warms my heart and guides my steps each day.

I miss you Mom and love you dearly,

Your daughter,

Dear Abuelita,
I miss you so much it hurts. I still wish that you never got sick. I know it would be wrong to say it's not fair, but it isn't. You were a bundle of joy to be around and you always brought happiness to our lives even when we were in our darkest moments. I wish you were still alive. I know you can see that I have a wonderful boyfriend, but Abuelita...you would have loved to have actually met him. He would've loved your cooking just like the rest of us. That is another thing I miss about you....your out of this world delicious cooking. What seemed to be a very large and rather time consuming dinner to us was just a little something you cooked up. I always loved when you said that. "Oh it's just a little something I cooked up!" It is one of your famous lines. :)

God how I wish your time wan't up yet. I miss you soooo much. I know I'm suffering from losing you as well as the rest of the family but Mom and Ito just kill me. I always think to myself how Mom goes on. She takes after you especially with always being so strong. I admire Mommy so much. You should be proud to have raised such wonderful children. My poor little Abuelito. Thankfully he is getting better then he was earlier this year. I almost thought he was going to just give up. But no he fought through all the pain and is finally getting stronger. He misses you so much it hurts me. Sometimes i can tell he is attempting to be strong but you can just tell all he wants to do is be in your arms again. Oh how i wish i could be in your arms again. I loved how soft your skin was all the time. I miss all those times you would offer me candy and just look in your purse and pull out your little baggie of candies. I loved how you kept pretty much everything in your purse, right down to your little water bottle...Hehehehe. I wish there was a special potion to bring you back. We all need you. The one thing i am thankful for is that you are not suffering anymore. I couldn't stand watching you sit there and just wilt away. I'm sitting here at my desk staring at a picture of Ito, you and me. I was probably only 1 or maybe 2. I just love it. Everytime i see a picture of you...sure i want to break down and cry but then i just look back at that picture and think of the wonderful time we had that day and it makes me feel better. I love you and miss you so darn much Abuelita...you need to come back. Well I'm not quite sure how that would be possible but maybe it can happen. :) I love you and I will talk with you again soon. Xoxoxo Te Quiero Mucho Abuelita! Besitos!

Hi Little Mamu, how I've been missing you. So much to tell you. We recently took a trip to California, for Doug's 50th birthday, the kids came as well, we also took Daddy. He was great! Enjoyed everything and we met up with your son and all his family. They were all in good spirits and we had the best time. Just absorbed every minute of it, Dad did so well with everything, he did like the boat racing part, he saw many accidents and was concerned for the drivers and very interested in what types of boats were out there and who did what. Very cute. Mom, we are very happy that he is finally feeling more himself these days, he's eating and being more socialable. I pray he stays healthy for a long time. I miss you so, I want to call you and chat about all the things that are happening here, your grankids are all grown up and so bright and beautiful. You would be so proud of them. They will go places in a few years, they both miss you very much. Doug and I talk about you all the time, we get very sad but then we find something adorable or cute that you used to do and then we laugh and smile at how precious you were. We're taking care of Daddy, so don't worry about him, ok? I love you so much, I think you know that. Talk with you soon, your daughter, Xi-Maria...ha-ha-ha

Hi my little friend, I wanted you to know I drove past your home the other night and saw lights and people in the front window. How wonderful to know another family will be filling it with the love that you once did. Sometimes it is hard to believe you are gone, and I think to myself maybe I will get an invitation to dinner on the weekend. Miss your wonderful dinners, but most of all miss seeing your little face as we raved about how good everything was. I think of you often and suffer when I see how much Maria is hurting with missing you. Fernando seems to be getting back his health after a long time with tummy problems and not eating. He had a great time in California with his son and his family, so I am sure that did help him to get better too. I like to think that by now you have met my Mom and Gramma. I know you will love them, as you did me. I picture you sharing some recipes with them. Miss you and know you are well now, so that makes it so much easier to let you go.

Love to you, Lynn

,

Hi, Mom, well, Dad hasn't been doing well these past few months, his health has declined as you probably know but we are all trying to get him back to health and trying to take care of him as best we can. I'm sure everything will be fine once the doctors get a handle on what's going on. You probably also know the nice surprise we've just received regarding the house...it's really quite amazaing. Out of the blue we get an offer. How wonderful, right? Dad will no longer have to worry about it and can sleep better knowing it's no longer a concern for him and us. Wish us luck. I know you'll be taking care of him for his procedures from your end so that gives us a positive outlook. I miss you terribly and really wish you were here...things aren't the same without you, Mom. I love you very much, your daughter, Maria.

Dear Mom, I miss you so much that it hurts. Taking care of Dad and trying to help him through this very difficult time, he's not doing as well as I'd hoped yet but I'm staying positive, hoping that he'll find his way soon. I love you very much, your daughter. Mo

Dear Olga, As I read these entries, they confirm what I have always felt about you. You have been a gentle soul, quiet and calm. Yet, your selflessness, your compassion, and your boundless love for your family and friends has been so powerful and so inspirational. This is why you will live in our hearts forever and we will continue to draw strength and peace from you. Bless you! I miss you! Love, Sheryl

Dear Olga,
The year since you are gone has passed quickly. The tears that have flowed are many. Your smile has never been forgotten, and the stories you shared are still being told. Your love will be treasured forever and passed on to the grandchildren you left behind. I miss you my dear friend, and think of you often. Love Lynn

I just wanted to put this picture up, because our smiles say it all. I love and miss you!

Dear abuelita,
It has been a year since you have passed, but tears still seem to build as i choke up thinking of all the things that you did for me and the family. I got the chance to finally visit your gravestone. It still doesn't feel the same, your not there but around everywhere. It hurts to see grandpa always so down, i wish you could help him some how because he needs you more than ever. You were truly someone special to our family and you completed our family. Although your are not with is in the physical form you are within our hearts. Its amazing what cards life deals you but in the end it makes you the person who you are to be. Your death has made our family closer and even though you are gone we still have you within is to guide us in our lives hoping for better days. I wish i had a chance to have said goodbye one last time, to tell you that i love you and that you have filled my life with inspiration and love. I wish you were here to listen to my accomplishments, but i know that the reason that im doing good is because of you. You give me the motivation to keep on going. I hope your proud grandma! Because things get really tough sometimes, but i have to shake it off and keep moving. I love and miss you terribly that it hurts. You will always be in my heart till my time comes and i finally get to be with you once again. You are and were an amazing woman who made such a beautiful family that i thank God for everyday. Rest your soul. Love you always abuleita, your grandaughter Carolina.

Dear Ita,
I want you to know that i miss you very much...u are a great inspiration to me and have showed me a way to go through life with less complaint and more courage...i love you very much and i hope u continue to guide me as u always have. I love you.