Ronald Doane Obituary

To my Family in Chicago

My heart is with yours with the lost of Uncle Ron. Sorry I was'nt there for all of you. I'll never forget the love that uncle Ron & you all gave to us when we came to visit. It was such a special time and I'll always be grateful. Aunt Barb I love you & Will be Keeping you in our prayers.

Love

LouAnn & Jim

On this day noone knew

that God would make a special call to you.

You're in a better place sitting beside the one and only.

With the love of your ancestors.

You live on through your family and you still remain.

You will be missed ever so much,

many share the pain.

I send my sorrow to the family of Grandpa Doane.

Candice Whitecotton

Dear Ron,

Why is it always after someone passes away do you realize that there were so many things you would have liked to have said to them? This is my attempt to tell you the things I should have said to you when you were with us. First and foremost I have to Thank you for your wonderful daughter, Betti. She has been the love of my life. She has given to me what is most precious to me, my three childeren, Jennifer, Bridget, and Michael. And through Jennifer a terrific grandchild, your only great- grandchild, Ashley. I see a lot of you in Betti. I dont't think you could have done a better job. You can be proud of her as I am.

You raised nine children which is no small task. And with no exception I am proud to be a brother-in-law to each of them and thier spouses, and uncle to their children. I hope my little crew turns as well.

And last but not least I thank you for all you have done for me. To show me what is needed to be a good parent when times are tough and things are not all well. To set priorities and stick to them. To help out when your needed(like after my transplant you stayed with me to help me get around, although your driving nearly put me back in the hospital.) And being a movie partner. We both had a love for movies. When we visit with your children: Scott, Barbie, Georgia, Donna, Jim, Ron, Bob and David I shall see you in all of them and think of you.

Ron, I apoligize for not saying these things to you earlier and a lot more that should be said. I promise to take care of Betti and my children as best as I can and hope that this will be part of your legacy.

All my Love

Michael Sr.

Presented at your Memorial Mass

12/28/2002

A few days ago, as we contemplated this day, the day that we will say good-bye to my Dad, We all felt that my father's eulogy in part should be given by someone who knew him. That duty has fallen to me and my brother Bob.

On behalf of our entire family, I want to thank all of you for your compassion and for being present here today. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Donna, and I'm one of Ron's daughters. Dad was devoted to every one of us kids, his wife, and those of you here today. I stand before you today the representative of a family in grief. We are all united not only in our desire to pay our respects to my Dad but rather in our need to do so.

We all knew that when Dad was diagnosed with cancer that the road to recovery would be a difficult if not impossible one, this last month has certainly reinforced that fact. His final days were gallant and heroic, and he gave us the strength to deal with it. He had a deep passion for his faith and love of God. He is with God now, there is no doubt.

Today is our chance to say thank you for the way you brightened our lives, even though God granted you a shortened life. We will all feel cheated always that you were taken from us, and yet we must learn to be grateful that you came along at all. Only now that you are gone do we truly appreciate what we are now without and we want you to know that life without you is very, very difficult.



Today we are gathered to celebrate this passionate life of Dads', a man who was a loving husband to his wife and our Mom, Barbara, a devoted father to Betty, James, Myself, Georgia, Ronald Jr, Robert, David, Barbara, & Scott a father-in-law of Michael, Patti, Wayne, Karen, Mary, Linda, Mark, & Katie a doting Grandfather of 22, a great-grandfather of one, and a Friend & Colleague to so many of you.



Dad made living life easy, he was always there with Mom to give us kids advice and support, instilling in each of us a sense of self, purpose, and perspective. Raising children is a very difficult task, and Dad and Mom have done it the way it should be done and have every reason to be proud of each & everyone of their children.



I have a great respect for my dad. He was a hero to me, and the first man I ever loved. I admired his strength throughout his life. I respected him for taking on a ready-made family, and yet raising us as his own. He loved us four older kids as he did his own five children. And as we spent his last days together at home, he knew that each of us loved him, and we knew he loved us too.

As parents nothing was too much for them to do. Perhaps even more importantly, Dad & Mom gave their children, a solid sense of security, of belonging, of knowing exactly who we were, where we had come from, and where we could go in life; fundamentals that formed the foundation for a successful future.

Dad had a passion and a love for life, an always-positive outlook that could see the best side of even a dark situation, and the uncanny ability to make what seemed like major problems melt away, by simply handling them with action & basic common sense.

I'm sad that his grandchildren and great grandchildren have missed and will forevermore miss all this amazing and wonderful man had to offer. They’ll miss his eyes, full of love and compassion, his youthful exuberance in building anything; they’ll miss his saunter, they’ll miss his appreciation of the finer things, they’ll miss his joy over a great bargain, they’ll miss his genius of things too numerous to count...of things wiser men study years and still never grasp. They’ll miss the warm, tight grip of his hand intertwined in theirs.



We have all despaired at our loss over the past week and a half and only the strength of the message you gave us through your years of giving has afforded us the strength to move forward.

The past month has seemed like a mighty big blur and at times a nightmare. We really are trying to figure out what his passing means- why did it have to happen? how will we go on? what will we learn from this? ......all of this while we terribly miss him!

Without Dad’s God-given sensitivity we would be immersed in greater ignorance at the anguish of those less fortunate than ourselves and the plight of the homeless.



A friend of mine told me that the final lesson that your parents will teach you will be with their death and I think that there is some truth in this. In the past month, I have opened up a lot more to my friends and family. I view life in a different way. Right now, I'm not as ambitious and as busy as I used to be. I treasure the quiet moments even more now.



I'm mindful, as I look out to all your faces, that most of us haven't seen one another since the last wedding or funeral. It saddens me, that worldliness, and pre-occupation with self, and petty thoughts, have kept so many of us separated and separate. It would be nice if here, today, now, this moment, we could all draw close, clutch one another's hand, and in Daddy's name proclaim love. Remember the good, throw away the rest. We all hope that you'll share your memories of him with us, if not today than in the weeks and month to come.



It is impossible -- especially on this occasion of irreparable personal loss and sorrow -- to summarize the life philosophy, talents and accomplishments of my Dad. Please bear with me in this flawed attempt at covering the many aspects and attributes of this wonderful and profound man, who so personally touched our hearts and our minds. His has been a most valuable, rich, and complex life.

Dad had a rich and exemplary life, cemented with deep faith in God, hard work, and remarkable talents. It all boiled down to a singular ability to harness and deploy his know-how for the betterment of mankind -- fully living up to the Parable of the Talents.



Prior to Wednesday, I really didn't know what to say. I thought I might dwell on the five stages of mourning: Denial, anger, sadness, bargaining, and acceptance. I know that all of us in the family have undergone those steps: We all wanted to deny that he was sick: I think he did. I know that we are angry at those things that took his life from us. Naturally, we are all very sad to lose him, and wish to bargain with God to bring him back to us. Even in the last hours of his life, I was still hoping for a miracle. But now each and every one of us, must accept that the next time we see him, except for the videos and pictures we looked at Wednesday, will be in the next life.



In accepting this loss, I am reassured that there is such a life. I have accepted that all the science and technology in the world cannot hope to explain it. Jesus said that my kingdom is not of this world, and indeed it is not of this universe. That no objective, clinical observation can ever be made of it.

When I shared this speech with a friend, she gave me a quote by Kahlil Gabran which reads “When you are sorrowful look again in your heart and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight” Over the past few weeks, I have relearned something we know as infants, but forget as we age: Sorrow is just across the border from joy; crying is much like laughter. We will miss him. It is already hard to come home to that big house without him there.



He was quiet and perceptive, kind and honest, possessing a quick wit and a questioning mind.

Dad passed away from this life exactly the way he wanted to - in peace with himself and his accomplishments, and in the knowing that he had loved, and had been loved, to the very end. On behalf of the family, we thank you all for your support here today, and for honoring Dad's life with your presence.

Daddy I love you so...you're with the angels now...show them how to fly.



Love, Your Daughter

Donna M Wadsworth (Doane) RN

Distance and time never took the love from our beloved uncle he was a one of a kind to us. So gentle, caring and witty, we are so thankful for the memories he did give to us. And we will miss him dearly, but we know that our Mom and her little brother Uncle Ronnie are watching over us together now. Love ya Uncle Ronnie.

Love

Robin Mincer

Manchester NY

My grandfather meant more to me than words will ever be able to express. I know that I will see him again in my dreams and feel him within myself...but nothing can replace the hugs...I love your grandpa...xoxo

I will miss my grandfather very much. He was kind,caring and filled with joy. he loved his family very much and I hope he knows I will miss him and I will never forget him. I LOVE YOU GRANDPA

Love, Bridget

We are so sorry for your loss!! Love, Holly, Bill, Cailey and Connor

he will be missed

My father was a very special man and he touched the heart of everyone he knew. He was funny, caring, generous and loving. I will miss him so much. Dad you will always have a special place in my heart, you are my hero!!! I will love you forever! Love Barbie

My heart goes out to all the family of Ronald. From what I heard of him, he truely seemed to be a good man and will deeply be missed by his family and friends. He is a lucky man to have such a large, loving family to carry on his memory.

No one will ever know how special of a man my dad is ( I just hope he knew), but I'm glad that I had all the time that I did with him. He will always live on in my memories, my heart and my soul. I Love You Dad !!!

Dad I miss you so much................